Music Discs
by Mr. Towel
Summary: Southpark the movie songs on the discworld, can't think of a good title, now with crappy puns 4 titles
1. Massive Riverside Town

Theres a bunch of dwarves on the street,  
  
And some trolls, uyou wouldn't like to meet.  
  
Oh, the snows pure on the Ankh-Rich and BROWn!!  
  
Just another Sunday morning in my noisy over-populated smelly TOWN.  
  
The sun is shining and the grass is green,  
  
Under the two feet of poo I mean,  
  
This is a day, when it's hard to where a FROWN.  
  
All the happy people stop to say hello?  
  
(Random passer by) GET OUT OF MY WAY  
  
Even though, the temperatures low.  
  
It's a perfect Sunday morning in my noisy, ill-mannered smelly TOWN  
  
(Angua)  
  
Oh what a picture perfect boyfriend,  
  
Just like a demi-god, tender and mild.  
  
He'd wear a smile while he wore a heavy crown.  
  
What an angel whith a heart so sweet and sure,  
  
And a mind so open and pure,  
  
It's a shame we live in this noisy smelly town.  
  
(Back to main singer)  
  
You can see your breath hanging in the air,  
  
You ignore homeless people, even though I care,  
  
It's a sea of villans in which you'll likely DROWN  
  
(Gaspode (intelligible mumbling))  
  
mph,  
  
mph mph mph mph mph mph mph mph  
  
mph mph mph mph mph mph m mphhhhh  
  
(Main singer) That's right Its Sunday morning in our noisy, massive, troll-full, dwarvish TOWN  
  
(Rust)  
  
Look at that fraile and fragile watch,  
  
It really gets me down,  
  
The disc is such a rotten place  
  
And this cities a complete disgrace,  
  
That's why I'm leaving this rotten little smelly, dwarfish troll-like TOWN  
  
(Main singer + Gaspode + Vimes + Nobby)  
  
OFF TO THE WATCH HOUSE WE SHALL GO,  
  
Where we do everything that we do,  
  
Cause the watchmen have to learn by listening to their FEET!  
  
And my partner makes my life complete,  
  
Cos she is really sweeeet (Vimes) Super sweet  
  
Thank Om we live in this noisy massive troll-full dwarfish smelly  
  
WOOFWOOF  
  
ANKH-  
  
MORE-  
  
(Vimes to Dibbler) can I have 5 sausages inna bun please???  
  
PORKKKKKK  
  
(Climax)  
  
NO. 


	2. Launch into the abys from the last hero

(origianally 'Little boy you're going to hell' Now 'Over the edge'.)  
  
The crew are about to leave in Leonardo da Quirms flying machine  
(Narrator)  
(Song starts)  
Crap Wizard at peace,  
What is this place?  
Beyond the stars?  
Open up your eyes.  
  
(The kite starts heading towards the edge  
  
What are these things?  
You're moving towards?  
(Boats explode ahead of them)  
Head so full of wonder,  
Worries in the past,  
(The kite launches into the air)  
Could it be that you are free at last?  
NO!!!!!!!!!  
  
(The Kite plunges over the edge of the world.)  
  
________  
  
(Rincewinds imagination)  
  
Little one you're goin to hell  
Said No spells,  
Watched others well,  
And that was at your peril!  
Theres one place to go  
I think that's its called Hey-ll  
  
________  
  
Little boy its time for you to PAY!!  
You lost the hat,  
And that was that,  
Now its Hey-lll,  
Go under the disk,  
Tell you what,  
You're goin to HELL  
________  
  
Goin' down to hell,  
Your goin' to hell  
________  
  
Goin' down to hell,  
Your goin' to hell  
________  
  
Goin' down to hell,  
Your goin' to HELL!!! 


	3. The men gendermes

(Originally 'Kyle's Mum's a bitch sung by Cartman, now 'Angua's a bitch' set at the end of men at arms. At the end of this song, wizards cast a magic spell that made the watch forget this. )  
  
**************** Gaspode came into the watch house and saw a smashed jar  
  
"Its all Angua's fault, its all because she's a bi-"  
  
Carrot chimed in, in time  
  
"Don't say it Gaspode"  
  
The dog got a mischevious look on his face.  
  
"Weeeeeeeeeeeeellll"  
  
"Gaspode, I'm warning you!"  
  
"Okay, ok I won't."  
  
Gaspode walks off.  
  
Carrot told the watch.  
  
"Good, I'm always fed up with him calling Angua a bi-"  
  
(Gaspode slides in and starts singing)  
  
We-lll,  
  
Angua's a bitch,  
  
She's a sleek furry bitch,  
  
She's the strongest bitch in the whole wide world,  
  
She's a sexy bitch,  
  
If there ever was a bitch  
  
She's a bitch to all the crim-ee-nals.  
  
________  
  
On hogswatch she's a bitch,  
  
Soul cake night she's a bitch,  
  
On Wednesdays and Fridays she's a bitch,  
  
Stays in on full moons,  
  
Just to be different.  
  
She's a super king come major major bi-atch.  
  
________  
  
Have you ever met sergeant Angua,  
  
She's the strongest bitch in the whole wide world,  
  
Shes a sexy bitch,  
  
And she has shiney hair,  
  
She's a big big big big big big bitch.  
  
Big big big big big big big big,  
  
She's a sexy bitch.  
  
________  
  
(Carrot) OO  
  
(Gaspode)  
  
Angua is a bitch,  
  
And she's such a dirty bitch.  
  
She has been around the world,  
  
And she is still, a big big bitch!!!  
  
________ (I cut out the bit with all the different languages singing) ________  
  
Have you ever met sergeant Angua  
  
She's the sexiest bitch in the whole wide world  
  
She's a scary bitch,  
  
And she has shiney hair  
  
She's a big big big big big big bitch.  
  
Big big big big big big big big, she's a dirty bitch.  
  
(Nobby)  
  
Uh-Oh  
  
(Gaspode, not noticing)  
  
Angua is a bitch,  
  
And she's such a sexy bitch.  
  
________  
  
I really mean it An-goo-ah,  
  
Is a big fat FUCKING bitch,  
  
Big old fat fucking bitch Ang-wuh.  
  
Yeah-bi-tcha  
  
(Stops singing)  
  
(Looks at the shocked watch)  
  
(Turns around)  
  
"FUCK" 


	4. Intresting Rhymes

(Sung by lord Hong, his cronies, and random townspeople)  
******************************  
  
Times have changed,  
The city's getting worse  
They won't obey the watchmen  
They just want to steal and curse  
Should we blame the emperor?  
Or blame society,  
Or should we blame the pamphlets that they read?  
NO!!  
(Chorus)  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
With their gold grabbing eyes  
Their flapping heads so full of lies  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
Blame Ankh-Morpork,  
We need to form a full assult  
Its vet'naris fault.  
  
________  
Don't blame me for my son 2-twang,  
He saw the great wizard  
Now he's off to join the clan,  
And my boy 3 bright-suns  
Had my iconograph on his shelf  
And now when I see him he tells be to repress my-selfff  
  
WELL!?  
Blame Ankh-Morpork,  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
  
It seems that everythings gone wrong since  
Ankh-Morpork came a long  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
It's not even a real country anywaaaayyy  
  
________  
  
My son could have been a doctor or a eunuch,  
Rich and true,  
Instead he sat like a fat lil piggy round the barbeque,  
Should we blame the pamphlets?  
Should we blame the flyers?  
Or the guys that turned him into such a lil liar.  
Heck No!  
Blame Ankh-Morpork,  
Blame Ankh-Morpork  
  
With all that football Hullabaloo,  
And that bitch called Angua too,  
(Just Lord Hong and his cronies)  
  
Blame Ankh-Morpork,  
Shame on Ankh-Morporkkkkkkkkkkk  
For the smuttiness up,  
The disrespect,  
The lousy puns,  
Abusive fun  
We must blame them  
And cause a fuss  
Before somebody thinks of blaming ussssssssssssssssssssss!!!! 


	5. Men without Qualms

What would mister Vimes do if he were here right now?  
  
He'd make a plan and he'd follow through,  
  
That's what Samuel Vimes would do.  
  
______________  
  
When Samuel Vimes was playing football,  
  
Against the klatchians,  
  
He did a really skilful double kick,  
  
While elbowing Cly Bold  
  
And when Samuel Vimes was in uberwald,  
  
Fighting werewolves  
  
He used his magical common sense,  
  
And saved a dwarf called rolf  
  
______________  
  
What would mister Vimes do if hewas here right today?  
  
He'd surely prod a buttock or two,  
  
That's what Samuel Vimes would do.  
  
______________  
  
(Unlucky sausage buyer)  
  
I want this poison out of meeeeee  
  
It is flushing straight through my bo-dy.  
  
(Carrot)  
  
And I just want the gone,  
  
To stop killing everyone.  
  
(Detritus)  
  
For Ruby I'll be a watchman too,  
  
(Everyone)  
  
For that's what Samuel Vimes would do!!  
  
______________  
  
(Carrot)  
  
What would mister Vimes do?  
  
He'd get everyone in town,  
  
And tell them to unite for truth,  
  
That's what Samuel Vimes would do.  
  
______________  
  
(Music lowers in Volume, and a strange man walks on)  
  
"Did someone say Samuel the mime?"  
  
(Nobby)  
  
"No, you retard, Samuel Vimes!!"  
  
"Sorry"  
  
(Exeunt Samuel the mime)  
  
______________  
  
When Samuel Vimes,  
  
Travelled in time, to the year 19 and 10.  
  
He fought the evil Carcer thing,  
  
Saved Ankh-Morpork once again.  
  
And when mister Vimes saw the pyramids, he beat up everyone!!  
  
'Cos Sir Samuel Vimes,  
  
doesn't take shit from  
  
An-y-bo-dy.  
  
______________  
  
So, let's all get together,  
  
And unite to stop the gone,  
  
And we'll save Vetinari too,  
  
Cos that's what Samuel Vimes would do,  
  
And we'll save the Patrician too, cos  
  
That's  
  
What  
  
Sam-uel Vimes  
  
Would  
  
Do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Cos that's what Samuel Vimes would do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	6. Jingobells

I do not own the disk world or south park the movie. (  
**************************************  
  
(Constable visit)  
Om has smiled upon you this day  
The fate of 2 nations in our hands  
And blessed be the city watch, we,  
Who fight with all our bravery  
Till onl-y the righteous stand!  
(A few of the watch start to look worried)  
  
You can see the distant flames,  
They bellow in the night,  
You fight in all our names,  
For what we know is right,  
And when you all get stabbed and cannot carry on  
Though you die, Ankh-Morpork lives onnnnn  
  
(The whole watch is very nervous now, but Carrot and a few others join in.)  
You may get stabbed in the head with a dagger or a sword.  
You may be burnt to death or skinned alive or worse  
But when they torture you  
You shall cry and shit your pants,  
Though you die, Ankh-Morpork lives onnnnn  
  
____________  
  
(Lord Rust)  
Blame Klatchia,  
Blame Klatchia,  
Because the disk has gone awry,  
Tomorrow night those pigs will Die!!!!  
________  
  
(Army)  
Tomorrow night,  
Our lives will change  
Tomorrow night  
We'll be entertained  
They'll run from our swords screaming,  
What a sight.  
Tomorrow night!  
________  
  
(The prince of Klatch)  
Over here  
There so much room,  
Where camels burp,  
And Nomads bloom  
Tomorrow night the Ankh is doomed,  
And So I Will Be Going Soon!!!  
________  
  
(21 Achmed)  
Shut your fucking face misses werewolf.  
You're a ass licking bi-atch missus werewolf.  
(Angua)  
Looks like I may be out of luck,  
Tomorrow night we're pretty fucked!  
  
________  
  
(Vetinari)  
Why did Lord Rust start this war?  
(Nobby and Colon)  
What the fuck are we pedalling for?  
(Leonardo da Quirm)  
When did this all become Ankh-Morpork???  
________  
(Colon)  
I want to be up there!  
(Prince)  
When Ankh-Morpork lose the fight,  
Tomorrow night we'll re-unite  
(Carrot with visit looking a bit nervous at what he started)  
They may cut your dick in half,  
And feed it to a pig.  
And though it'll hurt,  
You'll laugh  
And dance a dickless jig.  
But that's the way it goes,  
In war you're shat upon  
Though you die  
(#Colon#)  
#I want to beeee#  
Ankh-Morpork  
#Up there#  
Lives on!!!  
(~Lord rust~)  
~Blame klatchia ~  
~Blame klatchia ~  
~Blame klatchia~  
~Blame klatchiaaaaaaa~ 


End file.
